Being judged

Whilst being a mom is not only hard enough us moms have to deal with judgement by others on a daily basis.

Before I had kids it was so easy to put my two cents in. After my children were born I take it all back. As moms we should be empowering each other and not judging, helping and supporting each other not judging, giving advice not judging, helping one find solutions and sharing experiences but definitely not judging.

Things have changed

Since our grandparents were kids things have changed, the world has changed, and in turn-omg children have changed. I think what’s important is to hear advice take criticism with a pinch and move on. Often or not I’ll hear the grand mother complaining on what is right for her grand kids but hold up when we were younger that’s not how it worked and if we lived by grandmas rules our kids would be completely over indulged. Not that our moms don’t have the best advice cause they do. I turn to mine for every little thing that worries me so the support is appreciated as long as it’s not my flaws you’re pointing out all the time, although in saying that sometimes it does take a neutral party who cares like you do to point out the “bad” things we repeat with our children all day.

But you know why? It’s because things have changed now days women have something to prove not only in the workplace but at home and among themselves.

Support don’t destroy

So not only are we up early sorting the laundry, fixing snacks, making breakfast, packing bags, taking out dinner to defrost, sorting out our work stuff and then having to get the kids ready for school that we have to worry how we fare at work and then still trying to hold it together when we get home. From a mom who actually doesn’t have a full time job I don’t know how 7-5 mommies do it. I take my hat off to all of you, so who are we to judge if her child is having a tantrum in the woolies isle at 5:30 rushing through to grab dinner on the way home whilst the older one is already late for soccer practice and has not even started homework!! Please I welcome your child’s tantrums I support and salute you mom!!

Moms who are the maid and stay home all day cleaning cooking fixing and riding around for your kids all day I salute you too!!

Even the moms who have the support of Granny fetching and doing homework and easing the load a bit you’re still a mom who’s pressures may override your day? Or the guilt of not being able to take your kids swimming cause you need to have two salaries to survive each month I salute you.

I think before we feel ourselves wanting to judge the way some moms act, treat their kids and the rules they instill pause and take a moment don’t judge!!

God gave us each what we can handle and sometime we can’t.

I often feel myself completely overwhelmed trying to hold it all together and the little pressures I have I can’t. As mom there’s certain sacrifices we’ve made and have to continue to. Lots of moms stay home as a sacrifice for their family and others have to work as that very same sacrifice.

Well that’s been my difficult place where I’m in.

I love my job but it’s come to a point where I cannot be there for my kids and continue to do what I do so I’ve taken the plunge and resigned. One and I know not the last of biggest sacrifices I’m making for my children. How I wish I could say that we can afford for me to have this opportunity I can’t. So now trying to find something flexible that I can still help out with the bills ect is going to be very difficult. As I feel there is no perfect job where a mom can have both.

This is where judgement has stopped

Yes I can’t do both, I’ve tried I’m not the best cook or cleaner definitely not Suzie homemaker even though I am now going to base myself from home. I am able to say it’s difficult to do both even working 3/4 day has been challenging with my kids and trying to be there for them. I was loosing myself as well not giving them the best of me I could. Now I’ve been given the chance to change this and definitely going to try.

Firstly

A happy wife is a happy life.

I’m going to get into shape, start introducing healthier options at home and hopefully get back the energy I had before I was blessed with my children,

Not only physically but mentally need to keep myself challenged and busy if an opportunity arises that I cannot turn down and involves me going back to work I will set my expectations down from the beginning and remember why I’m going on this journey to start off with.

If I can find something to start off from home online trust me I’m going to do it. But to keep that Mommy guilt at bay I will be making all the decisions with my children’s best interests at heart.

They grow so fast and are only little for so long I’ve already missed so much and don’t want to miss another second. It’s extremely difficult for most households these days to even think of mom giving up her 9-5 to be with the kids. I’m blessed my other half is being very supportive during this life change and helping me until I get on my feet.

I see so many women trying to do the best they can but sometimes it’s not possible to be with our kids all the time and because my mom worked all the time I made the choice to do what I love but to be able to be the one to fetch from school ect. I want them to know I’m their number one fan and will support them in all their adventures as soon enough they are not going to need me as much. How excited I am for this. How nervous I am too and what if months go buy I can’t bring in a salary?? My sense of independence out the window. I do believe that a women should be independent and have their own even if little income to support the things they want and not necessarily need!

Trusting the universe

So my journey of self discovery starts. Laying down any judgement I’ve ever had, help those who I’ve judged be the supportive friend where needed and at the same time find myself heal myself and get started on this beautiful new chapter of motherhood I’ll be entering.

Who knows what the universe has in store but staying confident and positive that I find my niche I have to be.

Tag along and we can help each other and at the same time sharing our experiences with each milestone we get to.

So stay tuned!

First closing one door to allow others to open is what I need to do.

So let’s support each other in our motherhood journey we are each taking !!

Step 1: Get fit this will be my next segment and how I think I’m going to do this without killing my self.

Share your experiences and life changes you’ve made to better your family.

This is where life starts.

Warm wishes always xxxx

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