Sibling love/rivalry

If you have a sibling or have two kiddies I’m sure you’ll share my sentiments. If you’re thinking of having another you will too.

From the day my tummy started growing with my second my son was involved. Although he never came to any scans we prepared him early on for the new addition. We involved him in all our thought processes and as soon as we knew the sex we told him. I felt this was the best way for him to expect what was coming. A little sister is what he was getting. Although 2,5 years of being the only child was coming to an end and big changes were upon us all we tried to prepare him as much as we could.

The day they met

Coming home from the hospital had me nervous and sad all at the same time. How was I going to split my time and love. I was so used to only having that special time for him and I. Well from the minute he saw her he was besotted. I remember the first time he held her so gentle and so carefully. He was still just a baby himself. Although things changed a lot and our time together was less he adapted so so well. Obviously dad started to play a more important role as mom was busy with baby but really did the world of good. I got him to help in every way possible and tried the best I could to involve him with the tasks that involved his little sister.

The wobble

As they grew older together a beautiful relationship formed something every Mommy wishes to see. My son now had his purpose he was now responsible too for this little person. Teaching her everything he knew, and her trying everything he did too. I never noticed that he got jealous but around 6/7 months he hit a little wobble. Baby was getting cuter she was getting a personality and quickly there was tons of attention on her. I could see he took strain. Only way to help him overcome this feeling of envy that he didn’t understand, was to always compliment him for being the great big brother he was and is. Praising him for teaching her all the cool things she had learnt. This quickly passed and we were onto a new phase of having two.

Finding a best friend

Watching them grow together has been the most rewarding thing ever. I really have been blessed to have two children who absolutely adore each other. From the time she could walk and talk my son and my daughter played hours and hours together. The best present we could have ever gave given my son. A friend that never left, one who slept over every night and one who looked up to him no matter what. Although I know they will never be as close as two sisters or as close as two brothers as their interests and commonality will change as they get older I definitely feel they will be best friends for life.

Watching them start school together made me a very proud mamma. How my eldest took the reigns and looked after his sister so well. These two years were the best and they got along great.

New chapter

So big school approached for my eldest and being on her own was a reality for my youngest. Thinking the new change of big school was going to be where we faced challenges it was my youngest who struggled. She longed for her brother his friendship and his company. Never actually realizing my eldest did it all by himself we just thought our youngest would cope. Eventually starting to make her own friends and adapting to her day without her brother things got better. He was finding his feet without her and her without him, as it would still be two years before they were back in school together again.

Yes they missed each other during the day. Thinking they would thrive with the time they had together in the afternoons, but of course like any siblings rivalry become more evident now.

Being the referee

I really hope I’m not the only one but these two can fight. Yes they love each other but the older they’ve become they can fight like cat and dog too. Trying to be fair to both sides and not playing to my youngest ones needs all the time it’s hard being stuck in the middle. One will touch something the other one has not played with in like months and swear it’s World War Two. Being fair has helped put out many disputes but we all still learning one day at a time.

3’s a crowd

So before when I played with either of them it was only Mommy this Mommy that. One thing about having two is that they out number you. Atleast when they did it they did it together. So when one was being difficult of course the other one followed. Heave, ho this Mommy thing is difficult at times especially when both are ganging up on you. My best bet was to get my eldest to co operate as he understands and very soon the little one would follow.

Two is best

So although two is a game changer in any household and the second one really comes with a bang, I’d have it no other way. To watch their relationship grow and the fact they have each other no matter what is priceless. There never goes a day if one is not around the other doesn’t ask for their sibling. Now that they are getting older things are getting easier. If not that we are learning to cope better. I know things will soon change again as we enter their teens and so on but I’ll cross that bridge when we get there. For now I’m loving every moment of both their different personalities and encouraging and strengthening their bond. As one day when I’m not able to be around no more there will be nothing better to settle my soul to know my children have each other’s backs no matter what. I pray they’re able to keep this bond for a lifetime and stay close through all their phases of life.

As these memories will last with them forever and make them the adults they are going to be.

I can only pray that their bond strengthens throughout the years and come other friendships and families that they stay connected for life. So if you’re thinking about having another I’d strongly recommend it. There’s nothing better than a sibling ❤️

Warm wishes xxx