Sitting here tonight I sit with a heavy heart
One of fear that something one day will happen to my child my baby I dont care how old they get they will always be our babies
As a parent it’s an ongoing cycle trying to keep our kids happy and healthy
When they are away from us it’s out of our control
Hearing stories come home of my eldest not being happy at school today didn’t sit well with me, as a boy in his class constantly is controlling his actions (at such a young age they are so impressionable) and my child being a softie can so easily succumb to peer pressure
I’ve written about bullying before and we’ve all seen the aftermath
When do we as parents get involved
My child is upset everyday, so do I reach out and talk to his teacher
Would she even know what’s going on?
Could she even care as much as I do as it’s my little boy ?
But when your child comes home with the same consistent moan about a child who he actually adores scary enough it worries me
I have a rush of feelings and emotion run over me what if ?
What will my son do or become
He’s such a follower and the thought of not having friends is worse than the one of getting in trouble or doing something you’re against
I remember I’d die for my friends and only the strong survived. I did so many things just to make people my friends like me I got used a lot too and today I have 2 true friends so it got me no where but I wasn’t ready to listen to my mom who always knew best
I don’t want this for my child
I can only talk to him and explain my history with him but it’s not the same he may take it but the will to follow might exceed
It scares me for the bigger things later on
Wow I didn’t know being a mom could be so hard
When you hear how upset someone has made your child you just want to take over but you can’t
I know I need to give him the wings to fly and the confidence to say no
I just hope and pray I do and will have done enough to keep him safe forever I know he’s going to get hurt and we have a long journey ahead it just scares me and brings tears to my eyes that I cannot do it for him
That I cannot be his voice or his feet
That I cannot be beside him or heal his broken heart
I wish someone explained a little more how hard this feeling of not being able to control his every move or action is. That someday he will leave completely and do it all himself. This feelings kills me
But I do understand that later that shall come now I can still stand beside him fight for what’s right and put any little kid in his place who tries to control my boy
Because today I’m his mom and I have the choice to let it slide or hear my child. Today I choose to listen to my son and I will step in
I will be his voice before something happens later.
Best wishes all xxxx